Posted by: dinainsuburbia | September 8, 2008

observations on teenagers in suburbia.

This morning I had to get blood taken for what is officially the beginning of my journey called, “lets see if anyone can figure out why I cannot get pregnant easily.”   The lab I went to is across the street from Massapequa High School, my Alma Mater.  The lab, located in a very large shopping center, is home to fast-food restaurants, variety stores, a supermarket, and (lucky for me) a Starbucks.

After I was through with my appointment (they took 10 vials- ouch) I high-tailed it to Starbucks to get coffee and something to eat (I had been fasting since last night in preparation for the blood tests).  As I was making my way over, I noticed a bunch of high-school students making their way over as well.  MHS is an open campus, meaning that students can leave campus during any free period, and come back when it is over. 

It was interesting, watching these high school students.  At first I was annoyed because there was quite a few of them- I was hungry and didn’t want to wait on line.  But then, I sorta started to become fascinated. Watching these kids- they all seemed so happy, so full of life.  Now, maybe it was because the school year just started last week, so they aren’t loaded down with assignments or burnt out, but they just appeared to be so vibrant.  And then I thought about myself and thought, “am I still that vibrant”?  I looked down at the bandage in the crook of my arm and wondered, what would the Dina of 1992 say to the Dina of today?  So desperate to give Maddie a brother or sister, I let them almost bleed me out!  Would 1992 Dina say, screw it?  You already got one good one, leave it be?  Or would she say, “you can do it bitch?”

I almost started a convo with the kid online next to me- telling him I too went to MHS.  But then I realized… he doesn’t care!  He’s got is latte and he’s on to the next thing- worrying about school, getting a date, making a team… whatever.  And seriously, even though to me, the distance between us isn’t that great (I can remember being in MHS like it was yesterday), he’d look at me and just see a grown up.  That’s right- a FREAKING GROWN UP.  But how come I don’t feel so grown?  I still feel just as unsure of what I’m doing as I was in high school.. maybe that’s the secret of life- you always feel like a teenager, you just get better at hiding it?

Oh- and by the way… at Starbucks I picked up something called “Perfect Oatmeal”.  I had no idea Starbucks sold oatmeal…. and I’m not sure if it is because I was so starving… but it was pretty damn close to perfect!  You have your choice of toppings .. i had brown sugar and mixed nuts.  I paired it off with a huge iced skim latte and I was in heaven!  Adult heaven.

Advertisements

Responses

  1. Good stuff! I really enjoyed this – very reflective! And of course, the mini-MHS reunion over the weekend put you in this frame of mind, I’m sure.

    I’m still reeling that there’s a Starbucks near MHS! Remember when that used to be Homer’s? 🙂

    OK, back to the point at hand…I think you hit the nail on the head. I don’t think you ever really “grow up.” Circumstances change, problems get bigger…but you hide your angst and plow on. Not very comforting, I suppose…but I guess we just deal with drama differently as we get older.

    Yeah, you’re vibrant! Don’t fret about that!

  2. you’re an old woman! you’re different. you’re an adult and you’ve had adult experiences. you’re a lot wiser than you were back then. i don’t think people change that much as they get older. they’re just more mature versions of their younger selves. we’re all the same people inside.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Categories

%d bloggers like this: